Do you want to know a little tactic I use to get ideas for articles sometimes? I play solitaire on my computer and wait for something to pop into my head. That sounds weird, but it works.

It’s January 21st 2013 right now, about 8:15am. I have the day off from work because it’s MLK Day, so I decided to use my spare time to write. I’ve been playing solitaire for about a half hour, and I can hear the TV from my living room. It’s on ESPN and there’s a show playing called “9.79*”. I don’t know if any of you have seen this; some of you probably have. ESPN has a great series they call “30 for 30.” This is a collection of documentary-style shows where they delve into some of the most compelling sports stories of the last thirty years. 9.79* is about the 1988 Olympic 100 meter dash final. This was the race where Canada’s Ben Johnson beat America’s Carl Lewis to win the gold medal and smash the world record with a 9.79 time. It was the biggest race in history, and probably one of the most hyped track events anybody has ever seen. The whole world was locked in on it, and then subsequently shocked when Johnson tested positive for steroids a few days after the race. His gold medal was stripped and awarded to Lewis, who had finished second behind him. Johnson was banned by the IOC and publicly crucified for his cheating.

I was sixteen years old when this happened, and I remember it really well. The rivalry between Ben Johnson and Carl Lewis was one of the hottest head-to-head competitions in sports. They were the two fastest men ever, huge figures that drew insane amounts of media attention. I remember watching that 100 meter dash final on TV and, like the rest of the world, gaping in awe when Johnson went 9.79. He absolutely demolished Lewis, who crossed the finish line looking like he was going to burst into tears.

When the reports hit the media a few days later that Johnson had tested positive for steroids, all hell broke loose. You have to remember that back in 1988, there hadn’t really been that many steroid scandals. Performance-enhancing drugs weren’t in the public consciousness the way they are now. These days, when we hear about an athlete taking drugs, we just shrug and say, “Oh well, we’ve heard this before.” We’ve grown numb to it after years of listening to the news about guys like Barry Bonds. But in those days, it wasn’t like that. Most people still thought the best athletes in the world were all clean, going out there and breaking world records just because of their talent and hard work. The shock and dismay of Johnson’s positive test turned the sports world upside down.

I guess playing solitaire with ESPN in the background paid off, because I’ve got an idea. This article is going to be about performance enhancing drugs (PEDs) in sports. Now, this isn’t the first time I’ve hit this topic. I wrote a PM article about it a few years ago. It was kind of a weird experience. I don’t think it was a great article, and it even caused some tense feelings between me and a few people because they disagreed with what I said. However, I want to go back to it because I think I can do a lot better this time, and it’s a good subject for anybody in strength sports. The only problem is that I don’t know what my final thought will be as I sit down to write. I always start articles with a clear conclusion that I’m working towards. But the subject of drugs in sports doesn’t have an easy resolution, and so I can’t guarantee I’ll be able to wrap this up with a nice little bow at the end. Let’s just get started and see what happens.

Ben Johnson and 9.79*

Johnson’s victory at the Seoul Olympics was like a hydrogen bomb. Nobody had ever imagined a human being running that fast. Carl Lewis had been lionized as the god of track and field ever since his multi-gold medal performance at the Los Angeles Olympics four years earlier. But when Johnson beat him at the World Championships in 1987, things got pretty juicy. There was a huge surge of national pride in Canada when one of their runners started kicking the ass of the golden boy from the big bad USA. As they crossed the finish line in the Olympic race, Johnson looked back over his shoulder for the last few meters so he could glare at Lewis. You could tell he really wanted to stick it in and break it off. It was probably the biggest moment in Canadian history since…hell, it was probably the biggest moment in Canadian history. Then he got popped a couple of days later.

The media’s treatment of him was savage. I’ve never seen another athlete take a beating like that in the court of public opinion. He was portrayed like a serial killer or rapist, from Sports Illustrated all the way down to elementary school classrooms in Canada, where teachers vilified him as a national criminal. And he lost everything…his gold medal, his world record, his reputation, millions of dollars in sports endorsements, etc.

However, this is where the story starts to get murky. There were eight runners in that 100 meter dash final (including Johnson). Six of those athletes either tested positive or got suspended for other drug activity sometime during their careers. Johnson, Linford Christie, Dennis Mitchell, and Desai Williams all failed drug tests, all for steroids. A sixth runner from the race, Ray Stewart of Jamaica, was banned for life in 2000 for trafficking drugs. Carl Lewis, interestingly enough, failed a drug test at the US Olympic Trials three months before the Olympics. He shouldn’t have even been allowed to run in Seoul, but the USOC decided to let him slide because of his stature in the sport. They ruled that he had produced an “inadvertent positive” after Lewis claimed that he had taken stimulants without knowing about it, and they let him off. Seriously, it’s like a bad joke. His positive test was covered up for fifteen years. Nobody even knew about it until it was leaked to the media in 2003. Ben Johnson demanded that Lewis be stripped of his gold medal when the news went public, but track and field let him slide again because of a three-year statute of limitations. So out of eight athletes who ran in that final, six of them either tested positive or got kicked out of the sport for drug involvement at different times in their careers. A British newspaper called this “the dirtiest race in history.”

It doesn’t stop there, either. The coaches and doctors who were behind the scenes in this scandal were some of the biggest scumbags you could imagine. Johnson’s drug doctor, Jamie Astaphan, was administering stanozolol to him and telling Ben it was something else. He was also making secret recordings of steroid-related phone conversations between the two of them so he would be able to cover himself if the scandal ever went public (and he eventually used them when he was put under investigation). He went on to serve jail time in the 90s for conspiracy to distribute cocaine and steroids.

And here’s my favorite wrinkle in the story. After Johnson tested positive, he spent years telling people that somebody came into the Olympic drug testing room after the race and spiked one of his drinks with steroids so he would fail the test. The world regarded this as the stupidest lie anybody could think of to avoid guilt and responsibility, and it was the butt of a lot of jokes for years. But do you want to know what makes the whole thing so freaky? It’s actually true. Carl Lewis’ coach, a guy named Joe Douglas from the Santa Monica Track Club, sent another American sprinter named Andre Jackson into the drug testing room in Seoul, and Jackson spiked Johnson’s beer with steroids. Jackson openly admitted this to Johnson years later, and when ESPN asked him about it, his response was, “Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t.” Douglas giggled as he told reporters that he used a very “sneaky maneuver” to get Jackson into the drug testing center so he could set Johnson up.

But don’t misunderstand what I’m saying here. Ben Johnson has freely acknowledged that he took drugs. He told his whole story in 9.79* and it’s all out in the open. He was sabotaged by the Lewis team through the spiking incident, but he was still juicing anyway. The point I’m making is that he wasn’t the only guilty party involved in the scandal. Many of the others have been exposed in the years since the race. And others, like Carl Lewis, have avoided any repercussions even though their own cheating has been verified. Lewis continues to give interviews where he makes sanctimonious speeches about how honest and clean he was, vilifying the druggies in the sport. The whole thing is just sleazy as hell, plain and simple. The corruption, lying, and shadiness of everybody involved makes you feel like you need to take a shower.

Win dirty or lose clean?

Johnson’s coach Charlie Francis started him on the drugs in the early 80s. He was very up front with Ben, telling him that all of the top runners in the world were taking something and, if you want to compete with the best, you have to take something too. Years after the Seoul scandal, Francis gave an interview where he said, “You reach a point where your natural ability will only take you so far when you’re running against the chemical barrier. The question becomes…do you take drugs and try to win, or do you content yourself with losing forever by not taking them?”

This is a depressing concept for clean athletes, but it’s something you have to get used to. I’m not going to blow smoke up your skirt and tell you I think the best athletes in the world are drug-free. I don’t think that. I believe almost everybody at the top of the world rankings is taking some kind of PEDs in sports like track, weightlifting, cycling, and basically every other sport where strength is a priority. Francis and Johnson, along with many others, say drugs are simply part of the equation when you get to that level. I believe this is true. So, as Charlie said, you have to ask yourself a question when you’re an athlete…especially if you’re a strength athlete. Do you want to stay clean and accept losing, or do you want to take the drugs and try to win?

I know this isn’t a pleasant question to have to ask yourself. But when you decide to commit your life to being an athlete, you have to grow up and let go of the way you thought when you were a kid…that you can become the best just by working hard and playing by the rules. It’s a rough world out there, and it sure as hell ain’t fair.

Robson da Silva was a Brazilian sprinter who ran against Johnson and Lewis in Seoul. He’s one of the only guys in the race who never got nailed for any kind of drug involvement. In 9.79* he said, “I decided to stay clean and lose.” He stayed away from drugs because he felt that his athletic life needed to be about character, not just winning gold medals. This is the choice I made as well. The drug issue was made very clear to me when I was a young lifter, just like Charlie Francis made it clear to Ben as a young runner. I decided not to take drugs because I didn’t believe it was the right thing, and I stayed clean my whole career.

However, don’t think I’m preaching from an ivory tower here. When people make the decision Ben made, to take the drugs and try to win gold medals, I understand. I might not agree with it, but I get it. Keep in mind, it was a little easier for me to stay clean than it is for some other people, for a couple of reasons. First, I probably wouldn’t have been a world champion even if I had taken drugs. I didn’t have that level of talent. I might have made an Olympic Team if I would have been able to avoid getting popped on a test, but I don’t think I would have been able to lift the weights to be the best in the world, even if I took every PED I could find.

Second, it’s very hard to take drugs and compete at the national level in weightlifting in the US because the random testing program in this country is so stringent. If you’re a highly ranked athlete here, you’re required to be in the random testing program if you want to compete in national meets. I was in this program for almost ten years, and I can personally guarantee that you get tested up the wazoo if you’re an American weightlifter. I’m not saying all of our top US lifters are clean, but the vast majority of them are. So it was a little easier for me to make the decision to stay clean simply because the chances of getting nailed were so high.

But let’s say I was a world-level athlete in a different sport, or maybe a different country, and there was a lot of money and other incentives available to me if I took the drug plunge. Would I stay clean if I was in that position? I don’t know…I think it’s safe to say that my choices might have been different. That’s why I try not to get too far on my high horse with juicers. I’m against drugs, and I don’t like losing to people when I know they’re only beating me because of what they’re taking. But I know there are many shades of gray in this area, so it’s not my place to totally condemn anybody.

So……?

It’s rough sometimes when you’re a strength athlete and you decide not to juice. There’s a kind of hopelessness you live with because you know there are ultimately going to be limitations on how far you make it. It’s a hard subject to write about, or even talk about, because it doesn’t seem like there’s anything optimistic you can finish with.

Guys like Ben Johnson decide not to accept that hopelessness. They risk it all to win gold medals. Okay, it’s understandable. And we haven’t even mentioned places like China or Russia, where taking drugs isn’t even presented as a choice for athletes. These countries have established systems where drug use is standard operating procedure. If you’re in the system, you take what the coaches tell you to take. Asking questions and having ethical debates simply isn’t part of the program.

But in countries like the US, Canada, and many others, athletes have to make a personal decision about drugs. You’ll have to make a decision too, if you haven’t already done so. I guess that’s what we have to end this discussion with…the idea that we all just have to make choices. I don’t want anybody telling me how to live my life, so I’m sure as hell not going to tell you how to live yours. You can still have a great career if you decide not to take drugs. “Great” might not mean you become the best in the world, but it can mean a lot of other things. Will you lose your public reputation if you get caught? Maybe. Johnson lost his, and so have many others. Then again, some people don’t even care if athletes take drugs. Other people say we should get rid of drug testing altogether. There’s no way of knowing how you’ll be perceived if you get popped. You basically just have to roll the dice.

This isn’t a great ending, and I knew it wouldn’t be. The drug issue isn’t something you can fold up neatly and tuck away. It’s messy, and I can’t solve it with a few pages of writing. It’s kind of like when you’re playing solitaire on your computer and you run out of moves. So you have my apologies for not giving you any solid closure. This is just one of the areas in your weightlifting life where there are more questions than answers, and we all have to navigate them in our own way. Make your own decisions, and be prepared to live with them.